ok.
i screwed the Japanese (PAPER - *the bold is for ppl like banana who has word recognition problems) today.
feel. like. shit.
i really hope i still can get a B+.
though the chances of it isnt high.
i really put in the effort.
thats why it sucks all the more.
i mean, you will definitely know its your own fault if you don't study.
but when u alr tried your best and it still isn't enough....thats like the horrible-st.
i think the world can't be anymore cruel than this.
like when david didn't get his internship at the Japanese firm even though it was a 50-50 chance and out of the two he could speak Japanese. and actually is head over heels about the culture.
yea, i know life is like this that it isnt fair blah blah blah.

-sighs-
lynds was right.
it sucks to sit for an exam for sth you like.
because.
the exams might make you hate it in the end.
why?
because passing is NEVER enough.
not for your parents.
not for society.
not for your dream.
not for your future job.
and of course, not for you, the all important "I".
why?
because the rest of the reasons (society etc) raised us to think that doing "ok" equals to "not enough".
in fact, i'm beginning to doubt the possibility of "ever enough".


anyways.
i'm quite glad i had lynd's surprise party to plan, it kinda took away the emo-ness of the paper.
poor hengwei had to wait for 3 hours for nothing.
i feel DAMN bad now.
sometimes i feel like wringing my mentor's neck for being this airhead-ish.
i mean. what happened to "bros before hoes"
(me and lynds are part of the bros though)
i dunno la.
haiz.
i just hope whoever the person is, that gives him the "wake-up call", won't be too hard on him.
sometimes he's like a kid.

PS. A SHOUT OUT to.....QING XIAN!!!
LOL.
i dno how u "stumbled upon" my blog, but HOLLA to the emo guy who tells me i think like a guy.
a compliment? wakanai.
haha.
i shall just pretend it is.

P.S.S:
- hall has suddenly become a greenhouse for the growth of drama. like, the heart-wrenching lover's partings (which i kinda saw from the roof-top) and the screaming and tears and the secrets that lie behind closed doors.

to weel; IF YOU READ LOL. i think, like in JC, dramas in LIFE happen at the most unexpected/ crucial times. SERIOUS.






















arggh.
today was not a good way to kick off the exams.

Labels: gakkou, one of those random bits, shiken, tomodachi