Me? Nephrite. aka Jade. Stone, first and foremost. Being human comes later. Nah. I'm just kidding. Film fanatic. Lit Major. Loves books (DUH). Dragon baby. Don't watch much TV. I want to live like its the last moon rising and scream, just like no one's there. Here, I might lose all of my control. Don't blame me later if you don't wanna heed my warning. sometimes I say things that don't come out right but its all in the heat of the moment. It's not too late for you to turn back now. In these Invisible Cities I will build by myself, I hope you will enjoy yourself. The city will be made of green and black. There will be no bed of roses, but a crown of thorns. There will be wilted red roses and drooping stalks of violets. There will be rainbows, but with no pots of gold. There will be more rain than sun, more tears than smiles. What? Did you think this was some kind of fairytale? Baby, wake up and smell the flowers. There are none. Where did the flowers go? I don't know. And then you will see the world through my eyes.






Your CBOX here, set width at 450px and height around 260px.


If
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Nephrite at 3:41:00 AM


ok .
WTH.

sometimes i wish i really could lose contact with the world.
i don't know why the small things matter so much.

I REALLY REALLY need a LIBRARY equipped with a ARMCHAIR and hot choc.
then i'll leave the world behind.
if a faerie came to take me to Avalon, or Never never land, i'll gladly go.



because, really. who cares?
and i really dont want to be like this.
but sometimes i just am.
and the more i revise for this paper on friday, the more AFFECTED i'm becoming.

there is NO SUCH THING AS LOVE.
there is NO KNOWLEDGE
there is NO FAITH.
NO TRUST.
NO BOUNDARIES.
NO FRIENDSHIP.


JUST.
alot of.


SEX. INFIDELITIES. LOST IDENTITY.
how we are all so alone,
something i don't wanna be.


sometimes, i wonder if my friends understand me.
AT ALL.
i wish i were more confident as an individual.
i wish i wasn't such a charity case (as B says)
i wish i wasn't so dependent on people
i wish.
like a fish.
CAN'T SOMEONE JUST DO SOMETHING FOR ONCE????????????????

i need out.
but there is no one.

its almost four a.m.
i'm staring at the keyboard.
and those last two lines are the only things left resonating in my head.

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