the great escape, again
Saturday, April 05, 2008
Nephrite at 12:05:00 AM
throw it away, forget ytd, we'll make the great escape
as of ytd, i have come to the conclusion.
as of now, or, for now, at least, im gonna be stuck in the middle of everything all over again.
for some rhyme or reason, i am the only one on talking terms w my dad.
and i, am not supposed to to to even like talking to him.
and i, have been escaping for these past 4 months.
my philosophy has all gone away.
my poetry is dead.
i am not functioning.
why am i not functioning?
how am i going to get myself reinvented all over again?
telling myself to become stronger is useless.
its like, acting cute.
people dont get stronger by telling themselves to become stronger.
they simply become.
and it has taken me one full decade to learn this.
saying stuff out loud makes it feel real. thats all.
whether or not its real, deep down, we all know.
i guess this is the point of soul searching.
laughter is a thing to me now.
without it i am nothing.
a non entity.
haha.
i can even say, i laugh to feel alive.
i wont quit though.
because i know my dad wants me to quit
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