Saturday, December 31, 2005
Nephrite at 10:04:00 PM
Konnichiwa~!
My Confidence makes ME luminous? this is so wrong. test results from one of the tests on tickle. lol....Being comfortable in your own skin isn't easy, but you're a natural. You prove that smart and sexy can come wrapped up in the same beautiful package.Calm and collected, you've got your feet on the ground and a good head on your shoulders. And even in the craziest of times, people feel at ease around you. Whether you're heading up a board meeting or a bake sale, being a leader just comes easily to you. So go ahead and take charge. Everyone will be glad you did! anyways.HAPPY NEW YEAR !!!! :))) HeLLo 2oo6!my new years resolution.1. more will-power to refrain myself from reading and watching too much. (books n tv, that is.)2. to make progress in econs n geog.3. to get into mass comm in NTU4. worry less.5. ___i'll leave this one blank for the moment. :)
merry xmas
Monday, December 26, 2005
Nephrite at 11:26:00 AM
MERRY XMAS people!!!and HAPPY BOXING DAY!!haha.on the eve of christmas... i was supposed to go out with jing, shawn and gang,but thanks to my mum, i had to pang seh them. -_-the four of us went 'shopping'.bought some undies and a shirt or two.went for high tea at Phoenix hotel..the three went to suntec while i went ta meet jeff to watch a movie..the cine was packed la. so we watched like, a end-at-midnight movie.rofl.got bombarded by 'snow' spray..people jus go 'round spraying other ppl la...even strangers..first time i see liddat..haha.headed to safra to meet aaron, gary, jas, jackie, teck hong, joce, jill n jo..hello. i dunno how to bowl la.the first time i landed on my ass, damn ungraceful can.after that it was better la.haha.reached home at 6 am.
the day of christmas.woke up..mum gave fifty..jill gave a shirt.my presents to them will prob be belated.dressed and got ready to go to my grandaunts hse.tho this time it wasnt aunt rita's house..saddening.but we saw kai, ming john, han joseph, mya and kira...my tiny cousins.shianne came only when we were abt to leave..we went to popular bookshop to stock up on stationery then went to bugis street to shop arnd for clothes....i ended up buying only 1 belt.haiz.oh well.overall it wasnt too bad a christmas i guess.
Im Green!
Friday, December 23, 2005
Nephrite at 1:38:00 PM
heyhey.. i took a personality test....Again...here's wad it says...tho some of it is accurate the rest im not sure of.."Green:You're green, the color of growth and vigor. Good-hearted and giving, you have a knack for finding and bringing out the best in people. Green is the most down-to-earth color in the spectrum — reliable and trustworthy. People know they can count on you to be around in times of need, since your concern for people is genuine and sincere. You take pride in being a good friend. For you, success is measured in terms of personal achievement and growth, not by status or position. Rare as emeralds, greens are wonderful, natural people. It truly is your color! "am i all of that?
haha.
i never quite thot of myself in that manner, however, who does?
green.
i cant deny im happy to be catergorised in this colour grp.
haha.
its my fave colour at the moment.
watched THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA ytd...
i think it was really good.
heh.
WWW!!
Wednesday, December 21, 2005
Nephrite at 6:55:00 PM
hey hey.went tur wild wild wet ytd...haha.with weel, Jillene, andrea n Ann marie ( correct spelling?)haha.weel was late...again...the funniest is tt i stayed the furthest but reached the earliest.like. wth,haha.and i was the only one w/o a swimsuit.totally mortifying i assure u.haha.@ first we tot we wouldnt get a tan cuz the weather was cloudy..but..we all ended up totally burnt.waha. weel n i has "shiny" legs...more like, DRY.haha.we went on Ulahlar like, 6 or 7 times!!! our all time fave...went to the wave pool twice, the jacuzzi, waterworks a total of 3 times...(2 purple, 1 yellow)and round the shiok river countless times...jux lazing arnd..haha.funny we actually FELT tired after it all.saw a lifeguard that reminded me of edison chen, and jillene got hung up on a little boy who sat with us on one of the rides. lol.headed to tampines mall...MET YAZID!!! doin; e salvation army thingummy..gave me lots of free starbucks coupons too.haha.went to the lib to get "The High Lord".helped an old uncle borrow his book.met jeffrey (yay! it feels gr8 to see an old fren after mths) to get back my fave storybk and borrow LOTR...came home for dinner den called Angela and agreed to help her with the selling of kinderland unis.so here i am now.shagged to D bone.i kena pack books too.boxes n boxes.lol.bb.here's something i got.IF A CHILD LIVES WITH... ......Criticism, he learns to Condemn. ......Hostility, he learns to Fight. ......Ridicule, he learns to be Shy. ......Shame, he learns to be Guilty. ......Tolerance, he learns to be Patient. ......Encouragement, he learns Confidence. ......Praise, he learns to Appreciate. ......Fairness, he learns Justice. ......Security, he learns to have Faith. ......Approval, he learns to Like himself. ......Acceptance and Friendship, he learns to find Love in the World.See? small things make a HUGE difference, period.
lalala
Sunday, December 18, 2005
Nephrite at 7:52:00 PM
finished two more books by an author called trudi canavan
"The Novice" n " The Magician's Guild" in "the Black Magician's Trilogy.
wanna watch narnia . read the series a long long time ago tho.
the nut cracker.
Saturday, December 17, 2005
Nephrite at 5:18:00 PM
this is the third time im blogging today.*sheepish*keep forgetting to blog what i initially wanted to say.yesterday.i attended a ballet performance by the Singapore Dance Theatre @ the Esplanade.its called "The Nutcracker".Us from Modern Dance HAD to attend it cus it was part of our Arts Ed thing.Audrey. Verena, Pam, Mas, me, Mei Yan, Yasin, Apple, Elaine, Shu ying, Shabila, Joanne and a few others were there. im sorry to say i dun noe ALL their names.but during dance, we hardly socialise and usually stick to our cliques.yup.we had to take a groupie aft the concert jus to show tt we all attended the thing.tho there were ways to cheat cux one of us came aft the concert jus to take the picif we din show we were there we'd have to pay 50 bucks for the tix.siao? tell me abt it.=Pthe world works in mysterious ways.i dun think it was a good interpretation of the story but since this IS singapore, lets not get our expectations too high.this is the second time i've watched "the Nutcracker".the first time was at Kallang Theatre by an English dance troupe and it was magical.ytd's performance was cute tho.bet many of ballerinas were arnd my age or older.the little gingerbread men n small ballerinas were totally cute.but the dance moves were somewhat repeated, like Mei Yan accurately commented.i REALLY wanted the programme booklet but they were selling it at 5 bucks a book!hello!.thats a day's allowance for me.haiz.i gave it a pass.kinda regret it now.haha.btw.mei yan n i accidently wore similar coloured clothes!!everyone thot we planned it.-___-"
continuation
Nephrite at 5:15:00 PM
wad do u get when u fall in love?u get a guy who'll burst ur bubble.how do u escape?hmmm.that qn will leave me pondering for a few days.
haiz
Nephrite at 3:46:00 PM
last christmas, i gave u my heart,the very next day,u gave it away,this year,im saving my tears...haha.that song is so true.tho, i cant believe it actually HAS BEEN a year.a year ago, i agreed to sth that costed a friendship, and worse, my heart.i knew there were risks and should have known the consequences,but i foolishly let my barrier down.there's no turning back now.i was nv relationship material to begin with i guess.hah.i was always hating boys. men. den i started to change my mind because whether i liked it or not, it was impossible to live without the existence of 'em,no way to wipe them out frm the world.and so i resigned to bearing with.i so shud not have changed my mindset.even now,i cant say i don't resent them at times.
simple beauty
Thursday, December 15, 2005
Nephrite at 6:53:00 PM
hey..i planned NOT use the comp today at all..den while i was doin' my homework, a thot stuck me and i CANT NOT pen, or rather, type it down.have u ever walked along a roadside with trees lining it?those grat big ones with tons and tons of leaves?and its roots stretch out so it cracks some of the pavement?there was one time where i was jus staring aimlessly at the row of trees as i walked den for some reason i decided to look skyward...but all i saw were the leaves of the tree, making a canopy above me. in that moment, i saw the outline of every leaf against the sky. in the day or in the night, it always awes me for some reason.another thing.the sea. the best sea water i have seen so far is that of tioman island.the soght is simply breathtaking.u can see coral, the waves in the sand made by the ripples of water.To me all that, is beauty, in its simplest form, and not a spot less.is that weird?more often than not, beauty is on the inside.but even more often than not, people only look at the beauty on the outside.and they judge. if the outside isnt up to expectations, then the inside isn't either.and so it goes.the smoother a person speaks, the more distrust i sow in my heart.the better a person looks, the more doubts i have abt the character.unless. i get to noe the person better. over some time.and. another thing. haha.i curious abt ppl.just plain curious. certain ppl catch my eye and i get curious. haha.is that weird too?"Curiousity Killed the Cat. But Satisfaction Brought it Back."=D
grr
Wednesday, December 14, 2005
Nephrite at 12:17:00 PM
am i not pretty enough? is my heart too broken?do i cry too much?am i too outspoken?don't i make u laugh?should i try it harder?y do u see right through me?haha. no. i m NoT in love, or out of it.tho sth is bothering me. i noe not what.but i shall soon find out.so jaded, frustrated,
its all so complicated.
There's always somethingIn the wayThere's always somethingGetting throughIt's not me.. It's younoe wad? i can't wait to be 18. but im kinda dreading it.jus abt two mths away. freaky..and some of my frens jus had their bdays, as in the dec babies.rofl.wee ling!!! our b-daes r coming!! and shena's too. =D
tagtagtag
Tuesday, December 13, 2005
Nephrite at 1:08:00 PM
Rules of e Game:- Post 5 weird/random things about yourself.
- At the end of the quiz, list the name of 5 people who you want next to do this and leave a comment you are tagged in the tagboard and tell them to read your blog.
Ready? hEre goes.
- i like it when it rains..espcially the smell of rain hitting the road. (weel, u should noe by now, haha)
- i can't do a split. damn. :( but i love to dance
- sometimes i like to debate with ppl when there's nth much to debate abt.
- people automatically think im pissed/sad/stressed when i don't grin/ smile. dunno y.
- i like mixing lyrics with my entries. check out my archives. :)
i tag! lyDia!
i tag! Nutzi!
i tag! AreTha!
i tag! Wan Jing!
i tag! KaT!
credits: this game is credited to tan weeling! she started it. F-Y-I. :)
jus tot u mite wanna noe. haha.
`dip it low, pick it up slow..`
i need an angel dammit.
Monday, December 12, 2005
Nephrite at 10:47:00 AM
Spend all your time waiting for that second chance , For the break that will make it okay .There’s always some reason to feel not good enough ,And it’s hard at the end of the day.I need some distraction or a beautiful release ,Memories seep from my veins .Let me be empty and weightless and maybe ,I’ll find some peace tonight .In the arms of the angel far away from here ,From this dark , cold hotel room and the endlessness that you feel .You are pulled from the wreckage of your silent reverie ,You’re in the arms of the angel , may you find some comfort here .studystudystudy.mugmugmug.plah!i finished another book called Phosphorescence..isnt that a nice name?So tired of the straight line and everywhere you turn ,There’s vultures and thieves at your back .The storm keeps on twisting , you keep on building the lies ,That make up for all that you lack .It don’t make no difference , escape one last time ,It’s easier to believe .In this sweet madness , oh, this glorious sadness ,That brings me to my knees .ok. look here.this is my life.im trying to make it work here!!i wanna get into the "U" so i can do right by my mother, to whom i am currently considered a hefty burden. that is understandable. every sch week i need extra money to buy or pay for something or the other.i am NOT smart. just an average student who needs to put in 100% or there will be horrendous results. dun have the talent of absorbing things when ppl say 'em like wad some ppl can do. oh no, i have to do things the hard way.my dad probably despises me and my sisters, hate me.i dun see why my dad should feel that way since he was a jerk. but my sisters....the whole thing is complicated.though the main reason is probably because i try to do whatever my mother wants and thus earn their wrath upon me. its the stupid habit of comparison.compare compare compare. cant anyone see that the only result of that is resentment and maybe even hate?so they resent me cux i abide by rules even if i do think it's bull. but i dun think i can do much else other than that. i can be bossy and selfish n gutless. i've never had the guts she had, or the heart to follow whoever's leading like the other one. im neither as pretty nor as clever as the both of them and the world knows it.i used to resent them cuz i never seemed to be better at anything but then, somewhere along the line, i decided i was proud to have two such sisters. but i realised how much i was torn. yes i felt pride but small things they did that seemed unfair to me would hurt me so badly. things they said were as sharp as knives and it all cut cut cut.now i dunno what exactly i feel anymore.i go out, or go to sch in the mornings, i dun speak to them much. when i come home i find that i have nth much to say. when stuff happens that make me mad, i fume quietly den let it go, whats the point of showing them they got to me? i probably seem cold and distant now but hell. feeling is tiring. something i dun wanna handle rite now. she says i've changed and takes on a disgusted attitude. it hurt, but i kept silent. i wanted to rebutt, but i didnt.all this time u were pretending, so much for my happy ending.anw.ytd, i'd thot of sth.what is the point of fighting for control or freedom?when freedom means drink?the drinking then overcomes senses sweeping the freedom away.one loses consciousness of herselfsenses and movement taken awayhow can that be freedom?when all u can do is sway?i need an angel dammit.
shine!!!!diediedie
Friday, December 09, 2005
Nephrite at 10:07:00 PM
cut my life into piecesthis is my last resortsuffocation.....suffocate. suffocation. suffocating. suffocated.is what i m feeling rite now.an invisible hand has clamped itself around my neck, my brain, my thoughts, my life.i can no longer feel, i will no longer need, i will no longer think.i will cease to be what i used to be.and become what i fear, what i hate. all is lost.or is it?heck i dun even noe what im saying. jus need to rant all of a sudden.i jus feel like sitting on my sorry arse and daydream.or read my storybooks.i dun wanna think about the 90 geography questions.or my math past yr paper bookletor my economics holi-kill-joy questions.or even think about what william blake or robert frost is trying to express thru their poems.tho perhaps blake shares some of my sentiments.the clod and the pebble remains my favourite...its discussion of love.. selfless, or selfish?Love seeketh not itself to please,Nor for itself hath any care,But for another gives its ease,And builds a heaven in hell's despair.So sung a little Clod of Clay,Trodden with the cattle's feet,But a Pebble of the brookWarbled out these metres meet:Love seeketh only Self to please,To bind another to its delight,Joys in another's loss of ease,And builds a hell in heaven's despiteso my friends....which is it?some of us might take a lifetime to decipher the answer, while for others, the answer just might be right infront of them. ;)
darn it.
Wednesday, December 07, 2005
Nephrite at 12:01:00 AM
i think im nt gonna blog so much anymore cuz the more i blog the more philosophical and dreamy i seem to get.way off track man, way off track.it could be due to my constantly conflicting character.PISCESAQUARIAN. totally opposite horoscopes la.and both me. wth.so tired.i finished another book. "Shapeshifter's Quest"cant wait for its sequel. :Dwatched Aeon Flux. reminded me of the handmaid's tale. n the island.met up with 'lao shi' aka mdm kheng, today.along with two of her other ex students.she gave me an esprit watch. i was elated. xDlunched at wisma. realised i haven been to orchard in mths.great. now i sound like some deprived kid. i m not. ok, mayb a lil. jus a teeny weeny bit.guess i'm gona resort to my past habit of mixing lyrics up to fit my emo n mood ba.when i made up my mindand my heart along with thatto live not for myselfbut yet for Godsomebody said"do you know what you are getting yourself into?"when i finally ironed outall of my prioritiesand asked God to remove the doubtthat makes me unsure of thesethings i ask myselfi ask myself"do you know what you are getting yourself into?"i'm getting into youbecause you got to mein a way words can't describei'm getting into youbecause i've got to beyou're essential to survivei'm going to love you with my lifewhen he looked at me and said"i kind of view you as a son"and for a second our eyes metand i met that with a question"do you know what you are getting yourself into?"i've been a liar and i'll never amount tothe kind of person you deserve to worship youyou say you will not dwell on what i did but rather what i do you say"i love you and that's what you are getting yourself into"i'm getting into you (getting into you)because you got to me (because you got to me)in a way words can't describei'm getting into you (getting into you)because i've got to be (because i've got to be)you're essential to survivei'm going to love you with my you said "i love you and that's what you're getting into"
pian ju
Monday, December 05, 2005
Nephrite at 8:11:00 PM
i really thot i'd never ever go back to that horrible state anymore.but guess wad.i am.i feel despair when there isn't a need to feel it.i feel like tearing my hair out and screaming and crying all at the same time.im angry and sad and hurt and i have no idea why.i feel the need for an adrenaline rush, pain, to feel i exist.i want to cry, but i cant. no tears flow. thats the only difference. i want to laugh, but theres nth funny to laugh at. i think im losing it. dammit.i can't take it anymore.the issue with jill. my education. their education.my future. their future.my mum. my dad.i cant take it.life. death. stress.i cant tell which is which, wad is impt, wad isnt.i am just so tired.'xing fu' is just a bluff. isnt it? no one is truly happy. no one.
chalet
Thursday, December 01, 2005
Nephrite at 8:37:00 PM
heyhey.back frm chalet lo!!this experience is like, once in a lifetime.haha.its the first time i stayed over at a chalet with no 'rents and the first time i see guys NOT doing the bbq.haha.but still it was fun.i still think the water bombs were a good idea tho perhaps i shud have placed them in the back of the chalet instead of the front. sorry! my bad.getting wet was a shock. especially when the person who bombed me was ping!!! and from behind!!i kinda lost it after thAT. haha. after taking revenge on her, i attacked the ppl standing the closest to me. and that happened to be jillene n jason n yan zhi. i think?damn. it was funn.till the neighbours decided to be killjoys.like, hello! the day n nite before the ppl on e right were downright drunk n noisy la! in the early morning somemore.and before they were drunk they were taunting and disturbing us. den the neighbours on the left were screaming and shouting...over playing soccer on playstation...like...-___-"den they were mahjong-ing!! like!!we din't even complain lor.talk abt unreasonable with a capital 'U'.-sticks out tongue-day 1.ger calls me every few minutes to change the plans.meet weel @ tampines mrt in disguise...(jus a hat actually, but hell, it worked :] )got to whitesands...only got BS...so weel n i made do..bought lighter...but forgot serviettes!!cabbed to the chalet, got to the unit. but no key.so....we went 'round the back...and... BROKE IN!! waha.slacked arnd abit while jill n bert were hunting for their prezzies.had cake.hit the PS. no beaching cux the weather was moody. :(went pooling. had dinner. went home. bathed. slacked. played games. watched tv. PSed somemore.laughed at the guys. y? they were asking funny questions. like. omgg.sneaked to macs.tried to ZZZ unsuccessfully..ended up chatting with ger most of the nite.day 2.woke up.breakfasted at BK.pooled.walked back only to realise it was time to 'meet' the guys to buy the food.why 'meet'? cus none turned up. till we bought everything alr.even then it was only ONE guy! hello! there is so much a person can do.haha.anw.us girls, being efficient, marinated, skewed, talked, brushed and wrapped the food all by ourselves. or, mostly, the six of us who didnt go to sch. :))we rock.prepared the water bombs. tho some of the bags were like, leaky n stuff.met ceyi.din eat much at the bbq..mr teo is freaky... he only introed himself as he was LEAVING!yea. then the bombing started.details as abv.after the bbq..bathed. jill, wee, hema, ping went to get barcadi.i din get to get drunk cus i was half dead as it was and i needed to get up early to bring jo for her checkup at KK. was pretty annoyed with ger tho.argg.wadevEr.today. went for dental and went to try n remake jo's ez link cux she lost it ytd but we dint bring her birth cert so it was a waste of time.haiz.red green.
Your CBOX here, set width at 450px and height around 260px.