The Blogger Daily

Me? Nephrite. aka Jade. Stone, first and foremost. Being human comes later. Nah. I'm just kidding. Film fanatic. Lit Major. Loves books (DUH). Dragon baby. Don't watch much TV. I want to live like its the last moon rising and scream, just like no one's there. Here, I might lose all of my control. Don't blame me later if you don't wanna heed my warning. sometimes I say things that don't come out right but its all in the heat of the moment. It's not too late for you to turn back now. In these Invisible Cities I will build by myself, I hope you will enjoy yourself. The city will be made of green and black. There will be no bed of roses, but a crown of thorns. There will be wilted red roses and drooping stalks of violets. There will be rainbows, but with no pots of gold. There will be more rain than sun, more tears than smiles. What? Did you think this was some kind of fairytale? Baby, wake up and smell the flowers. There are none. Where did the flowers go? I don't know. And then you will see the world through my eyes.

gdbye to u

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Nephrite at 7:45:00 PM

hey big D.
haha.
been bloggin' lots recently.
lazy ta write in my manual journal.

this mite hurt but if me saying goodbye to u will help u out then i think i can make that sacrifice.

u think im envious
perhaps i m
but not the way u think.
im envious she has the power to twist u round her pinkie
and i don't
im envious that she's lucky

but im not envious of her.
get that? no siree
u're so wrong.
jux goes to show how well u get me
which is next to nth
zilch.nada.zero.

thats wad hurts most.

remember u called one day and i asked wad happened and u said mux sth happen for me to call u and i said, well, thats wads been happening so far and things changed after that. u actually became a fren. and i became ur fren instead of jux a confidante. ya. and i was glad. but guess wad. maybe u havent changed at all. or mayb i expected too much as a fren. mayb i expected u to pick urself up and move on but no. so heres wad im gonna do. im not gonna expect anything. i always say u've got short term memory but im nv really serious abt it but now perhaps it was really true? esp when it comes to ur own stuff. i dunno. ya. i jux dunno anymore. and i think u tot i was envious cux i seemed worried? or overprotective but hey. i think i need to feel needed. ya. so when i thot u din need me anymore i was at a loss? its my fault on that part. all u keep saying is u'll stay away at the first sign of complications. and u keep saying no one cares anyway. wads the pt in that? u jux mite as well pretend i dun exist then. ya.

haiz. noe wad?
do wadeva u want.
really.

had three tests today.
im drained.
i ponned dance.
shit.
gotta stop doing that.
im jux screwing up my life.
but then again.
there was nth much left to screw with anyway.
im one of those kids in blakes poems where i mature n become cynical b4 my time.
thats jux it isn't it
i mean, worldly wise in life but ignorant of the world.
wth.
lata.